Category Archives: Uncategorized

Today I Sit In Pain

Sometimes we fall apart

In order to rebuild

Sometimes love breaks our hearts

Because our hearts with love is filled.

 

Sometimes life’s lessons

We be learning slow

And we run in all types of directions

When it feels like pain is all we know.

 

It can be hard to say we messed up

Or just admit you are feeling low

When you really don’t know how to deal with something

Or how to let the pain of it go.

 

It’s not that you feel hopeless

Or you don’t see scope to grow

It’s just you don’t really know where to focus

As your heart tries to cope, with letting its biggest hope go.

 

For I’ve been holding onto hope

In some misplaced broken form

And that hope gave me strength to cope

When my heart and world felt completely torn.

 

For every person needs love

And every person needs hope

And the world is hard enough when you don’t have one

Never mind when you are lacking both.

 

But in our heartbreak, we can find our issues

Pinpoint the things that hold us back

And rebuild some hope in ourselves

When in other situations hope retracts.

 

I always thought I had the answers

Of how to deal with most everything

And that every hardship faced

Was a chance to show strength in suffering.

 

But it’s become painfully clear here that I don’t

As this pain cuts that bit more deep

For while I’m used to rebuilding hope

Attached to this hope, was so much hope for me.

 

To admit you need another

Is just a reality, that comes easy to some

But when you’ve spent your life denying your needs

That can be a massive obstacle to overcome.

 

How does the thing we desire the most?

Become the thing that we most fear?

That we panic in the sight of it

As our body screams to us how long it’s been since it felt near.

 

Reminding us we can’t fight our feelings

We can merely try and deny as we bury them below

And we’ve to get comfortable sitting with them

If we have any hope in letting them go.

 

We can lose hope in other situations

But we must never lose hope in ourselves

We all have our own demons we’re facing

In our own external and internal hells.

 

For me it’s losing someone I care about

For reasons I must let silence tell

And in searching myself, acknowledge losing people I care about

Is something I know a little too well.

 

I can’t hide my vulnerability

Or even try deny the pain I’m in

In fact, I’m sitting in both, admittedly

But maybe in that there’s some kind of win.

 

I always thought I had the answers

Of how to deal with most everything

And that every life tragedy and event

Was a chance to show strength in suffering.

 

But this is a pain I’ve been trying to escape

Only it’s a lie to myself I can’t manage to sell

For there’s so much hope lost for me in this heartbreak

How much I could take, at times, has been hard to tell.

 

‘For pain can be a bludgeon

A prism to see through

Or it can be a smudge on

Your vision, a stain before a more beautiful view.

 

And it’s always been a stain for me

In the heart a painful shot

But I’ve taken many of those

And have yet to see myself stop.’

 

Or at least that’s the voice that’s been in my head

At every hurdle life has thrown in my view

And to a lot of good in my life that voice has lead

But something in it this time rings a little untrue.

 

I always thought I had the answers

But it’s become clear here how much I don’t

As I keep trying to outreason a feeling

But the feeling’s a feeling and stop it won’t.

 

Today the world is dark

Today my heart is blue

But every day is another torch to spark

And each soul is responsible for the torch in you.

 

For when one door offers closure

And hope feels hard to source

Remember hope is life’s greatest soldier

But it’s up to you to light the torch.

 

And that’s the torch we must carry

Even when others dwindle from our eye

For it’s the torch we kindle for life in ourselves

When times are dark we must never let die.

 

I can retreat into sorrow

Feel sorry for myself for a time

But I soon put my hopes back on tomorrow

For the day may be lost, but the future’s still mine.

 

We don’t always get the things we want

But that can help make sense of what we need

And as we let our demons haunt

We must remind ourselves to breathe.

 

We can grieve the living

We can grieve parts of ourselves

But we must keep gratitude for the life we’re living

Even when it hurts deep in our cells.

 

And as I process hurt

I only ever see more work on me

And for future relationships to work

That’s maybe the way it has to be.

 

For you can educate your mind

But what’s the use if you don’t educate your soul?

For it’s only in the connection with others

I’ve ever felt anything resembling whole.

 

So today I sit in sorrow

Today I sit deep in my pain

Allowing the hurt and sorrow

Run deep through my heart and veins.

 

Ain’t this life a terror?

Don’t it hit you where it hurts?

Where you slug through and suffer hardships

For life’s brief but sweet desserts.

 

Ain’t this life a dream?

Ain’t it all we’ll ever have?

And sometimes even at its worst

If we work, it still ain’t half bad.

 

So today I sit in pain

Admiring the beauty in that too

And know maybe tomorrow we return a little to colour

With an open heart and a different prism to see through.

 

But today I sit in sorrow

Today I sit deep in my pain

Admitting the only knowing is in hoping, there will come a tomorrow

Where these feelings won’t remain.

 

© Daniel Breslin

Cracks Of Light

The things that give us structure
The things that keep us sane
When we’re feeling completely ruptured
Dealing with our pain.
 
When the things that hit us hard
Let us not do things as we could
When we struggle in our hearts
To give ourselves self love.
 
When the things that cause us stresses
Keep us locked-down in our minds
And lockdowns surely test us
Especially over time.
 
When hope it keeps on leaving
Every time it feels near
And it feels life keeps on thieving 
Anything resembling clear.
 
We must focus on the small things
Hold those small things dear
And do our best above all things
Not to completely cave to fear.
 
I get mad at myself sometimes
And I get scared of what I have for me here
When I see less and less of good times
And things and those I love are seldom near.
 
It is then I cling to structure
And the little cracks of light that appear
They keep me from cracking up in my mind
And keep hope a little closer than fear.
 
Be gentle with your own minds
When dark times do appear
We’re all traveling through our own lives
With different challenges and hopes while we're here.
 
Battling our feelings and our minds
We battle most everything we fear
And I just hope as we walk through dark times
For you, that little bit of structure, and cracks of light appear.
 
When you are walking through those dark times
Try take something from the fact you are here
And keep battling through those dark times
Till those cracks of light appear.

© Daniel Breslin

Something Undeniable

Looking for something reliable
Something I can hold
Something undeniable
That doesn’t leave me feeling cold.
 
Looking for connection
With someone connected to me
Looking for affection
The kind I can feel or see. 
 
Looking for another
That doesn’t make me feel alone
Looking for the other 
To make this world a home.
 
There’s love in communication 
And that’s what I really need
I’m searching for a deeper stimulation
Something more for me.
 
I’ve spent a lot of time 
Meeting others needs
And I have a little hurt and anger
In how others have treated me. 
 
I have an anger with myself
In my needs and how I express them
Still learning in the loss
For in every loss a lesson.
 
I have an anger at myself
For actions, made in pain
But I show compassion to myself
For I sure can’t shoulder all the blame.
 
I have a sense of grief 
In how I might have made others feel
As I struggled for some peace and relief 
From the depth of pain I was facing, in my efforts to heal.
 
I have a sense of loss 
In the things that weren’t there for me
The things I couldn’t get across
The things others maybe didn’t see.
 
Pain can cloud your mind
Pain can cloud your vision
But pain must be given its time
If we are to really connect with the life we’re living. 
 
Nothing is resolved
Few things in this life are sure
But as I try to problem solve
Something deeper, feels, the only cure.
 
Every day’s a step
In the right direction
Where I grow, knowing a little less
In my journey, toward love and affection. 

© Daniel Breslin

Meet And Greet

Feeling sorry for myself
In some ways that’s where I’ve been
Trying to nurse a broken heart
Deny the pain I’m in. 
 
Kind of used to fighting pain
Just ploughing into something else
Trying to focus heart and brain
On making something of myself.
 
Always trying to make something out of it
Create something better than before
But for awhile there’s been really no getting out of it
And the pain in my heart has been harder to ignore.
 
This particular pain
Is not one I really know how to deal with
But maybe in that there’s change
Got to learn to accept and really feel it.
 
I’ve been in search of comfort
Not really sure of how or where to find it
As certain things in life give me such discomfort
And of them I’m constantly reminded.
 
We can try and distance ourselves from pain
Pretend our reality is not what it really is
That’s something I’m trying to change
But now and again I’m still guilty of this.
 
I’ve found some comfort in sharing
Something I’m constantly trying to improve
But sometimes some things in life are wearing
And you can’t help but feeling bruised.
 
But today the sun is shining
And I acknowledge that pain deep
And I lose the sorry for myself part
Not something you can always avoid but not a part you have to keep.
 
I go out and face the day
A little more aware, vulnerable, and yet stronger in who I am
We all have our burdens to bare
And not everything goes to plan.
 
I don’t even know what that plan is
Just that in my heart I want some change in
And I feel more certain in the knowledge, we all have days
Where it feels good, to meet and greet our pain within.

© Daniel Breslin

Sunset

I’m sitting in the stillness
Watching the birds fly
Watching the sunset
Give colour to the sky.
I hear my neighbours in their garden
Talk muffled behind their kids play
And I’m not intentionally trying to listen
But I can’t help but laugh at what the kids say.
 
They talk of missing school
How it feels like summer is already done
And they list the things they love
Like just to do that is fun.
 
There is such life in their voices
I’m lifted by the words they say
As they are so excited making their choices
Naming the things that make their day
I’m taken back to my own youth
Something that is forever slipping away
But kids have a way of giving it back to you
Effortlessly, in their play.
 
Talk about their favourite sandwiches
Simple things they love
Giving off the feeling
That this world is inherently good
And I return to me
As they venture back inside
And I look up a little differently
At the sunset in the sky.

I sit in the stillness
Feeling the breeze, watching birds fly
And I sense the loss of youth
To be a trick of the mind’s eye.
 
© Daniel Breslin

Every Day I’m Learning

Every day I’m learning
Through trials and tribulations
Learning about pain
Learning about patience.
 
Learning we don’t always get
For what it is we’re waiting
Learning about love
Learning about creating.
 
Learning about vulnerability
And the different ways we show it
Learning how to move in it
Learning how to grow it.
 
Learning what I want
Learning what I don’t
Learning what I no longer will
Learning what I no longer won’t.
 
Don’t always get it right
That’s a trick for the dead
But those of us with life
Need to learn to love ourselves through our mistakes instead.
 
Learning how to be more open
Let others deeper in
Learning how much I’ve kept closed
And as those doors open, of new paths to begin.
 
Always looking for improvement
Trying to learn and move with them
Set backs through bumps and bruising
Upsets to our rhythm.
 
Learning what I can
Learning what I could
Learning what I hate
Learning what I love.
 
Learning is the key
As I search for growth
And where there’s learning for me
There always remains hope.
 
Don’t always get it right
That’s a trick for the dead
But those of us with life
Need to learn to love ourselves, through our mistakes instead.
 
Every day I’m learning
Every day is a new one you see
And every day I’m churning
My mistakes into future opportunity.
 
Don’t always get it right
That’s a trick for the dead
But those of us with life
Need to learn, to love ourselves, through our mistakes instead.

© Daniel Breslin

Love In The Distance

I see love in the distance
I see love in a nod
In strangers who are neighbours
Who take to the street to applaud.


Players I can’t see
But a player or players I can hear
As they play music in a sign of unity
And to show that community is still here.


I see love in the distance
As I lean out and squint my eyes
To see neighbours coming closer
Keeping space, while leaving their homes inside.


I see love in the distance
In how they meet and greet each other
Their nods of applaud hold such significance
Non physical hugs, we now give each other.

I see community, I see spirit
I see strength, and I see will
And what I can’t see I can hear
And I feel the love, that distance can not kill.


I see spark and I see heart
I see unity and I see hope
In the spaces kept between neighbours
In strangers up the road. 


As they gather in their outing
For twenty to forty minutes maybe most
At a time full of doubting
To show in distance we’re still close.


I see love in the distance
In how we greet in a nod
And the physicality that’s now missing
Is replaced in a different bond.


I see love in the distance
I see love in music and a nod
In strangers who are neighbours
Taking to the street to bond in an applaud.

© Daniel Breslin