Paranoia’s eating me
It gets worse
I think it’s beating me
On top of that it’s cheating me
Out of everything
I plan on keeping for me
It wants the lot
Driving away everything I’ve got
Giving me visions
Of how others are living
Hours of fibbing
It’s building a prison
It’s trapping me in
My mind’s at it again
Thoughts in a spin
Picture her kissing him
Picturing them
Two cheating friends
Mind in knots
Over figment plots
Indignant shots
Get in and rots
At my sanity
Too smart for vanity
So I question their humanity
As he suppresses the man I could be
They’re my friends too long a time
To be fibbers, the thought is silly
But I’m at my wits end, as the thought hits my spine
My body shivers, as if it’s chilly.

Paranoia
You’re a mind destroyer
I don’t want to be your employer
All I do is annoy her
With foolish thoughts
That you have brought
I’ve tried I’ve fought
But it seems I’m bought
Just one more toy
You aim to destroy
Release this boy
And cease this ploy
Are my efforts in vain?
Can I beat your game?
Trips down memory lane
All you brought me is pain
Your work is invisible
But you leave me miserable
I just want to be happy
But you keep at me
Can’t let you trap me
Let your efforts zap me
Of all my energy
Leaving me just a memory
Of the life I used to have
The man I used to be
With you it’s twice as bad
Your plan’s no use to me.

Paranoia we’ve met before
Please stop knocking at this door
You’re getting old, becoming a bore
Let loose your hold, and leave me for
You’re destroying everything that I am
I really don’t like this man
I just stare at my reflection
And don’t feel we even bare a connection
Is my hold lost? Do we not relate?
As cold as frost, my heart breathes hate
Paranoid fits, that I resent
Have me lying in pits, of self contempt
‘I swear on the bible, I never meant’
My words spiral my descent
Falling deeper through his realms
Hard to keep her with him at the helms
Fine picks his spot with a lens
Then his arms extend
Now my thoughts descend
To her with other men
It eats me whole
Release this soul
Set me free
From your misery
End your spell
You’re making my life hell
Your negative thoughts
Are thoughts I need to expel
For only positive thoughts
Are thought to excel.

© Daniel Breslin

The aftermath
There’s no afterglow
Good times past
It’s hard letting go.

Highs were felt
Laughs were shared
The highs slowly melt
A burden bared.

What goes up
Must come down
Got a little messed up
Now I’m coming back down.

© Daniel Breslin

He can’t be consoled
Because he’s lost his hold
On something ice cold
But it wasn’t cold before
What’s in store
He doesn’t know no more
Never saw him chasing
Cause he never saw it wasting
Now he’s feeling cased in
As it seems she has replaced him
In the district that’s his heart
He was always strict and smart
Now in conflict torn apart
As she rescripts her part
The part he thought she was born to play
That heart use to warm his day
Is the part she has thrown away
A heart of stone is the role it plays
Why didn’t she stop and say?
All he sees is hypocrisy
He never even thought this way
Now feels caught in the light of day
He’s bare for her to see
Do you not care anymore for me?
The boat’s been rocked, this just can’t be
It seems she’s docked, left him at sea.

He’ s a fighter though this mans a swimmer
He ain’t no damn beginner
But on his mind this one’s a spinner
He’s been left behind, and he starts to simmer
Now at first he tried to swim after
But tide got him, and she got faster
Remembers how she was eyed, and how he cast her
Trying to battle his pride, still avert disaster
Time’s not on his side, if he wants to follow
Is it water or pride, he wants to swallow?
In balls of pain
He calls her name
Behind walls of shame
She calls the game
Caught by surprise, ended so abruptly
He said look in my eyes, she said don’t interrupt me
She said they played it out
He complains she never gave the shout
If I hurt you, you never warned or said
Now you hurt me and just storm ahead
You’re treating me like I’m not human
I’m choking on what you’re doing
It’s me and you, it’s you and me
But this isn’t you, this just can’t be
You can’t walk out, let’s talk it out
Water fills his mouth, his pride means bout.

He put pride beside love
And let love rise above
She put herself before them both
She pushed, he untied the rope
He starts to smother
But he’ll recover
From this lover
And one day he’ll find another
With her no longer beside him
He now feels his world capsizing
He knows life can be surprising
So he looks to a new horizon
She hasn’t got the will to go on longer
But what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
At the minute she’s all he longs for
But all he longs for he will conquer
He takes in his new surrounding
His heart’s pounding
She wasn’t clowning
She left him drowning
He’s in the water, with a paddle
When he hits land, he’ll be back in the saddle
As he begins to straddle
He wins a battle
Out at sea, he sees few joys
So he deploys his boys
They keep him afloat, when hope’s destroyed
Hope’s on a boat, saying it’s void
And as she gathers knots
He unties his own
He’s cold and shocked
But his boy take hold and guide him home.

© Daniel Breslin

Life,
A cruel twisted game
We live it for the highs
But too often feel the pain.

Your heart
It can burn like butane
When you give it all you’ve got
Just to watch it all go up in flames.

© Daniel Breslin

Hear the latest? we got rapists
Prowling corners
Found her naked, parents now
Howling mourners
Mourning their first born ones
Got the guards
Scowling corners
We got to catch this scum
Or this scum will start to think they won
It’s hard to fathom
I’ve a daughter and a son
And if it happened to either one
I wouldn’t stop till I got em’
This is my rally cry
Why did you have to let Sally die?
And Aly die?
In an ally why?
And they were pally why?
She knew him they use to socialise
She knew him he was one of the guys
They were out for drinks
She turns her head, in her drink he sinks
A ticking time bomb
Half an hour later her mind was gone
Offered to walk her home and got turned on
She felt safe as they walked alone, till he turned on
Poor little Aly
In a dark lonely Ally
Hadn’t even the strength to scream
As this scum took a queen
His sick fun took her dream
When he was done he cut her spleen.

Now Sally’s panicking
She missed the last bus home
Everyone wishes
She didn’t take the short cut home
They would of collected her
Why didn’t she phone?
They could of protected her
If she wasn’t alone
It was too dark
To cut across the grass
Broke many a heart
As the priest read his mass
He said her life was ended
Unbearably fast
Family praying to God
That this moment will pass
For him to bring her back to life
Make her listen to their advice
Their lurking in the bushes
Your hurting gives them rushes
He doesn’t pause as he ambushes
As he pushes her heart crushes
She’s crying
Why didn’t she listen to their words?
She’s trying
To figure, what she did to deserve
Her minds defying
All the actions of this perv
Spent the night spying
Behind the bushes beyond the curb
Now as he starts slaying
She says if he leaves she’ll never tell
Now family praying
As they grieve he burns in hell
Her clothes entangled
She froze while strangled
It’s hard to handle
We lit a candle.

The worlds a crazy place it’s wild
Another case gets filed
Another home place dialed
‘I’m sorry sir, I think we’ve found your child’
Expected this moment
But the tears flow
A terrible moment
Letting the ones we hold dear go
Lord no, not my baby, not my daughter
Another lady, falling victim to their slaughter
It can’t be
This the stuff you see on TV
I’m near insanity
My tears cry out for some humanity
They want me to identify the body
See if my baby is dead
I want to crucify somebody
What goes through their crazy heads
I’m craving bloodshed
For every tear shed
She’d want me to avenge her
I want revenge for
Everything they did to my daughter
I want her to know I fought for
My angel taken
I’m unstable shaken
My heart’s breaking
I feel forsaken
This is the biggest burden
Any parent will ever bare
We tried to plan
We told her to beware
But we can never truly prepare
For this unruly despair
They see women as easy prey
We’ve to do our best so they don’t get their sleazy way
So I’m a work night and day
To make sure this one doesn’t get away
So this is my rally cry
Why did you have to let Sally die?
And Aly die?
In an ally why?

Their trying to kill and rape our women
They get a thrill from hate filled sinning
Do we sit back and watch the linen dry?
As they attack and watch our women die?

© Daniel Breslin

He drops a knee
And cops a plea
Praying don’t you scoff at me
Please agree
To the possibility
Of you and me
Starting a family tree
I’ve dumped a knee
Please jump with glee
He bites his tongue
What has he done
She hesitates
His anxiety escalates
He scans her face
For a trace
Of what awaits
He wants a warm embrace
Not left a bitter taste
Did he act with haste
Her mouth goes wide
He’s doubts inside
As a tear comes to her eye
Eternity goes by
She lets out a sigh
Then begins to cry
His heart thumps in his chest
As she simply mouths yes.

© Daniel Breslin

How does he stop his mum from crying
When he tells her that he’s dying
How does he find the strength
To speak the words
Bluff strength
When he’s full of nerves
How does he best describe
There’s no chance left to survive
There is no easy way to explain
So there’s little way to ease the pain
When he dies
Some of her dies with him
Not thinking of himself
First wants her to forgive him
But when he looks in her eyes
They build a prison
So he looks to the skies
Prays strength will be given
Last night he prayed
For the first time in a long one
Poured a drink
Made it a strong one
Had a decision
Made the wrong one
Now the land of the living
Is one he doesn’t have long on
When he looks in the mirror
And it mirrors himself
He gets a shiver
Cause it mirrors bad health
Maybe some don’t see it
It’s something he can’t escape
Good life it was scenic
Now taken an odd shape.

Now he’s walking on grounds
He never walked before
And if he had the choice
He’d walk them no more
It’s a bitter pill
He has to swallow
Though he’s alive still
He’s not hollow
There’s still something inside
For the world to see
He’s not yet died
Won’t live in privacy
Now he’s told his mum
She could cry forever
But while he’s alive
He says smiles are better
Smile with me now
In what time we have
No good to allow
The mind think on the bad
The tears they’ll come
No matter how hard we fight them
So we should have fun
No need to entice them
When they come
We’ll fight them with strength
And when I’m done
Hold no hint of resent
No good to hold anger
Deep in your soul
No answer to the anger
You’re only digging a hole
Put down the shovel
Your whole life’s been work
Mama give us a cuddle
I can’t value its worth.

Life is full of chances
Many we take
Sometimes we like the answers
Others come back in our face
He went out with a near stranger
Someone he’d only just met
Was blind to the danger
Took a risk no safe bet
She was a woman of the world
He was a prowler of the night
Took comfort in this girl
Played a howler through drunken sight
But he doesn’t blame her
They are both victims here
Sometimes events occur
Where we must rise and persevere
We only get the one life
Now that seems all together clear
So while there is still sunlight
That’s light he’ll treasure dear
Life’s fight so ever near
Last rights are edging near
Yes he’s hedging fear
They are deeply embedded here
But despite this
He chooses to fight this
He looks for brightness
Through the slightest
Crack,
In the wall
Wants to try have a laugh
Have a ball
Now he wouldn’t wish it on a soul
The problems his and he takes control
And it’s funny
When people ask his mum how she handles this
Even through the tragedy a smile she always manages
‘When I look at my son and some look like he’s a weirdo
I think of all he’s overcome and in my son I see a hero’.

© Daniel Breslin